Give and take

Do you find that most of your friends fall into one of two categories? The ones who energize you and the ones who take it away. This past weekend I met up with three friends separately for various activities -2 baseball games, a football game and a jazz concert. After all three activities, I felt more energized and alive because of their company, always have with these three individuals. There are other friends in my life who, inadvertently, drained my energy. I consider both sets of friends good friends. Otherwise, I would not choose to spend time with them.

Two questions from this preamble:

1- Are YOU one who gives energy or takes it away from your friends? Which friends do you think you energize and which you do you zap? How about them to you?

2- What is it exactly that causes this energy imbalance?

Hmmm... for me there are a few factors that come into play with a friend....

- Do you feel restricted in the conversation - are there areas you need to stay away because it will cause a storm?
- Do you share the same outlook on life - is the glass half-emply or half-full?
- Is it an open-ended conversation or does everything tend to close quickly?
- Is there a spark?
- Is the status equal between the two of you?
- Do you feel free to say anything without worry of judgment or negative comments?
- Does your friend 'get' your humour? Vica-versa? Can you laugh about life?
- Do you share similar values, experiences and background?
- Do you share many of the same activities and interests?
- Are you both Leaf fans? The most important question of all!!! :-)

I guess there are different kinds of friends, now that I think of it for awhile... I have my activity centreed friends - like my pool playing buddies, my improv friends, my watching the Leafs/Jays friends, my renting movies friends and others. I have my discussion friends - who I like talking about the paranormal (ghosts, UFOs, psychics), philosophy of life, life after death, politics, ESL teaching, hitech world, hockey cards, etc... I have precious friends who allowed me to be uncle Martin to their kids - which is tremendous fun (kids give you the illusion that you're actually funny! :-)).

There are only a few friends, who during our conversation, we head into that rarely treaded territory that's just magical. There's a connection that is made and we start wondering to an area where you do not normally go, with someone else. It's like you have this favourite spot in the most remote part of the jungle and you look over and see another smiling face. This kind of friend shares a sacred trust and it is truely rare to find in my travels.

These kinds of friends you hold on to ....

These kinds of friends you always make a priority to seek out in life....

These kinds of friends make the experience of your life - high definition.
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Someone once said this to me...

"Friends come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime"